Our Personal Relationship with God Matters.




My reflection for today,

                                                 Our Personal Relationship with God Matters. 


I am a Christian and found my faith in Jesus at the age of sixteen. Sixteen years of my life before knowing Jesus, was just living. To elaborate on the phrase just living; I tried really hard to live by the rules of my social environment. I was never great at everything the world around me defined as best, but i tried. As a child it is easy to hide behind the phrase " Oh, she's just a child; she will learn". The older you get, those phrases disappear and so does the excuses. People expect more from an adolescens turning into a young adult. They want you to get serious, productive and effective. 

Now, in my forties, I do understand that teenage years are filled with conflict and growth. An age where we seek our identity, where we emotionally, socially and soon financially need to detach from our parents. We need to be individuals who can live life on our own. During this pursuit for independence we learn lessons, both good and bad. Some cause greater emotional wounds and need more time to heal. The intensity of the wounds depend on the value you place on the things. 

However, I was experiencing similar challenges in my teenage years. I felt lost in the dark and I was unable to see a way forward. I lost my joy. I don't know if any of you have experienced this personally, but when you are emotionally lost, you loss your worldly life as well. Meaning you become inefficient and useless and the Bible calls them "a salt without flavor" (Matthew 5:13). I was becoming inefficient. It was because, I forgot about the life before me and I was waiting for something that was uncertain; I was just living without being present. I needed help and I found my help in Jesus. 

I knew about Jesus , because I was born in a Christian family; I went to a Christian residential school for five years and went to a catholic college. However, never have I experienced his resurrection power before. At the age of sixteen, when i was lost and void; I chose to seek Jesus. It was a Saturday morning and I had to go to college. Instead i choose to stop by a Christian Conference. In the presence of God, among the saints, I was delivered from my void and darkness. I was filled with the Holy Spirit and the joy that I felt was unstoppable and my life has never been the same ever since. 

The first change that was evident was; understanding the word of God. I was able to understand the bible so clearly and I learnt a Christian way of living. The bible was showing me all the things I needed to change. Things that i need to get rid off, my habits, fears, pride, doubts, laziness and inferiority. I witnessed the power of prayer and the miracles that followed it. I was experiencing the bible verse " Delight yourself in the lord and you will receive the desires of the your heart" ( Psalms 37:4). Things that i need and not want :).  

Since that day, I knew i can turn to God whenever i feel lost and I have never been disappointed. New spiritual learning each day followed; First i learnt the importance of  Godly fellowship, the word of God, then the Power of prayer, and now God is teaching me the power of worship. As the Bible teaches us to " Rejoice in the Lord always" (Philippians 4:4)  and "The Joy of the Lord is my strength" (Nehemiah 8:10). 

Life is not always easy, but the bible teaches us that we all are tempted, but he also does provide a way out of it (1 Corinthians 10:13). I believe and I have personally experienced that Bible, prayer, worship and Christian fellowship are powerful tools to help you through your spiritual darkness. It gave me new life, new hope and new strength to move forward in Life. Jesus is a beautiful God, Oh taste and see that the Lord is Good (Psalms 34:8). Your personal relationship with God matters. 

                                                                                                               - With Love

                                                                                                                 Shilpa Catherine Jayakumar

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